22 January 2009

Gulp.

Okay, Rhubarb Whine sent me a new batch of questions! That's the good news. The bad news? I have to come up with some introspective, non-smartass answers.

Is it possible? Let's see...

1. What does motherhood mean to you? I don't know about Himself, but I prayed at least a million times for a baby. Our baby. Even before a few losses, I didn't care about hair or eye color, boy or girl, or any of the surface details. I just wanted a baby who would grow into a person we could be proud of. Someone to teach, and to whom we could pass on the things and ideals that were important to us. Someone that would carry on a part of the man I love more than any other person in my life, besides my little one. Now that he's here, I am grateful for the fact that he's beautiful, healthy, and more fun than I could have imagined. I'm also awed by patience and creativity he inspires within me.

Motherhood is mashed peas smeared up to your wrists while you and Baby laugh at his attempts at "finger painting". It's finding something special in the baby of a complete stranger, even though your baby is obviously the most gorgeous and intelligent child in the world. It's digging down and finding strengths that never existed before.

Motherhood, most importantly, is not limited to those with children. Love of the helpless, the innocent, or any child or lost soul is universal.

2. Tell me about one person with whom you've lost touch. If you hope for a reunion, how would you like that reunion to take place? If not, why do you hope to never see them again?

Hm. Wow, can you say 'painful subject'? Can I use generalities? Like the "friend" who was supposed to be closer to me than anyone and claimed he loved me but stabbed me in the back by sleeping with the one person guaranteed to destroy any semblance of ego I may have had before accusing me of trying to ruin his relationship with his fiancee and moving a thousand miles away? Yes, I'd like to see him again. I want him to try and look me in the eye while he comes up with a REALLY good explanation.

3. If you could have dinner with four contemporary public figures, who would the guests be and why?

Well, a lot of the people I would have chosen are dead, but let's see... Patrick Stewart, for starters. We could discuss Shakespeare and Beavis and Butt-Head. "Weird Al" Yankovic, because it takes a brilliant mind to write satire. The conversation would be nothing short of amazing. Tommy Emmanuel would have to be there, because the man makes me laugh. He's funny and witty and just plain nice. Fourth? I don't know. Maybe Queen Elizabeth II? Kind of a lazy choice, I suppose, but you must admit, she's seen just about everything. I'd ask her if she still remembers how to work on trucks...

4. Describe a time when you were faced with a stressful situation that demonstrated your coping skills -- did you lose it or cope admirably?

I think that I usually do pretty well in times of stress, but there was one time that I completely blew my stack in a spectacular fashion. Two, actually, but one was in public and had to do with my ex-spouse -- I'm entitled. The other was during a very bad day. I had a paper route (one hundred twenty miles a day on gravel roads in the middle of nowhere. The paper was late, things were going badly financially (I was on my own at the time), and I was just having a hell of a day. Then it started to rain. Then it started to storm. Then it started to hail! I pulled up to an intersection, windows down so I could see, rain dripping off of my eyelashes, murder in my heart. I looked left, no cars. I looked right, no cars. For some reason, I looked up.

Funnel cloud. A tornado was forming almost over my head. I literally went insane for about two minutes.

"@#$%-DAMMIT!! AFTER THE @#$%& DAY I'VE HAD, THERE IS NO @#$%ING WAY YOU'RE GOING TO @#$%ING DROP A @#$%ED TORNADO ON ME!! GO THE @#$% BACK UP IN THE @#$%ING CLOUDS WHERE YOU @#$%ING BELONG!!!!"

No kidding, the funnel actually sucked back up into the cloud and disappeared. I finished my route, went home to a hot shower, and knit the world's most tightly-stitched scarf before sleeping for twelve hours.

5. If you could have one superpower, what would it be?

Because I am secretly evil, I would be telekinetic. Not so I could get a cup of coffee from the comfort of my chair, but because I am firmly against eminent domain. I think it's theft. I think it's wrong. I think it would be wonderful to drive by a site that was once a beautiful old farmhouse but is now on its way to becoming an ugly shopping center and knock that sucker over with a thought. Every time they tried to put it up, down it would go. No tracks, no evidence, no apparent crime. "Gee, those guys can't build for crap! Guess they're gonna run out of money and have to go away, huh?"

Yeah. Awesome.

Hey, that was kind of fun! I think the idea now is to pass it on, so if you'd like to be pestered, er, included in the meme, just leave a comment asking for an "interview" and I'll try to think of some good questions for you. My thanks to Rhu for making me think, and to you all for letting me rant.

5 comments:

loloen said...

I enjoyed reading this! Loved the tornado story! :)

yarndork said...

OK, now you frighten me.

Mags said...

Hey~
You just awed me with your answers.....I'm speechless.
Happy knitting.

KFG said...

The tornado was great, but that line about not having to have had children to be a "mother" brought tears to my eyes. Thank you.

KFG

rhubarbwhine said...

You did a splenorific job there, I like your answers to these so much better than the ones I imagined for the first round. (snort).

A great read, thank you!