23 July 2007

Kntting on the road.

Kntting on the road. It's a great book. I have it at home. Unfortunately, the concept is almost completely unworkable when you're actually in the car.

A lot of the scenery around here is lovely, but on occasion, it slips into dullness. At such times, I like to have a book or knitting along to keep me occupied between comments to and/or from Himself. Small problem. If I read more than, say, two pages, I get carsick. Not just a little whoopsy, mind you, but that nasty cramps-in-the-back-of-the-neck, oh God my eyes are leaking and my intestines are trying to recreate the Gordian Knot kind of carsick. For some reason, knitting doesn't produce such symptoms, but it's still impossible.

Reason 1: gravel roads. This is the big rural, baby. There are even one or two gravel streets still left here in town. You stand a much better chance of performing do-it-yourself acupuncture with your knitting needles than any kind of decent stitching.

Reason 2: slab construction. I don't think the highways around here are actually made using slab construction methods, it's probably heat cracks, but the result is the same. Perfectly spaced gaps in the asphalt, filled in with tar. Said tar does NOT lie nice and flat. Nay, it creates mile after mile of tiny speed bumps. This leads to mile after mile of cursing as I struggle to manage at least one round of sock. I'm lucky if I manage to avoid a good poke in the eye! Where the tiny speed bumps are non-existant, there are waves in the blacktop. Attempts at knitting under these circumstances usually sound like this: "Ba-dump ba-dump ba-dump ba-dump SIGH ba-dump ba-dump wub wub wub wub wub SNARL ba-dump ba-dump ba-dump wub wub wub @#$&!!!! wub wub ba-dump" et cetera.

The thing that blows my mind is the fact that the roads are like this all the time, in spite of constant construction. "Hey, we have X amount in the budget, let's spend it before they take it away!" Fine, good, but let's spend it on something that's actually an improvement! Use quality materials and workmanship, not just some guys and a truck that your brother loaned you! Knitters unite! We must stop the roadway menace before we are reduced to staring at billboards, unable to knit. Write to your Department of Transportation. Save your stitches!

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