Gimme a javelin, I'm gonna hurl!
I'm a writer and a storyteller, but even I can't make up something this bizarre. If Stephen King and Dave Barry published a collaborative effort, it would go something like this: Remember the explosion that was anticipated over the care of Mom S' bird? Ka-freakin'-BOOM! Lady Voldemort began screaming at Mom S, capping off her tirade with the immortal phrase, "If I lose my daughter and granddaughter because of this, it's ALL HER FAULT!" Meaning me. The daughter in question is due to have a baby any day now, and is apparently stressed because of my "theft" of the bird. Shame on me. Now Voldette is doomed because of my selfishness.
Screw this crap. Where's my knitting? Ah...
How do I find so much time to knit, you ask? Because I'm supremely lazy. If I'm going to spend time doing stuff, I'm by-golly gonna get the most out of it. Standing in line? Got a sock right here! Downtime at work? Out come the needles. Rehearsals? I don't play an instrument, so my hands are full of yarn. See how it works?
I think I would be much more of a surly person if I didn't knit. My stash is saving the world...from me!
Here's a cool bit of news: we've been invited to play at a mini-bluegrass festival. There's even talk of remuneration, which is a rare and wonderful thing. More music, more knitting, and a box of fig bars in the mailroom. Life is good.